Hank Smith: 00:04 Hello my friends, welcome to another followHIM Favorites. My name is Hank Smith and I’m here with the amazing John Bytheway. Hello, the amazing John Bytheway.

John Bytheway: 00:13 I’m trying to earn that title. Thank you, sir.

Hank Smith: 00:15 It’s good to be with you again. John, you know the routine for followHIM Favorites. We take a single question from this week’s lesson, which is Matthew 18 and Luke 10. The question we’re going to focus in on right now is, how do I forgive another person for something they’ve done that has hurt me? That comes up in Matthew 18. Peter says, “How many times do I have to forgive someone?” And Jesus says, “70 times seven.” And then he tells the story of the unmerciful servant. John, how in your experience have you found it, how people are able to forgive?

John Bytheway: 00:51 Gosh, such a good question to answer in five minutes because it’s one thing if somebody takes your Captain Crunch, and it’s another thing if… I mean some of the things that people go through, aren’t you amazed Hank at some of the trials that people have? And sometimes it’s like, I can’t forgive, and you want to say you’re right, you by yourself, maybe you can’t, you’re going to have to get some help. You’re going to have to get a blessing. You’re going to have to get with your bishop. You’re going to have to get the Lord to help you because some things that happen are so difficult. But I think a quick answer is, blessed are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy. And when I reflect on, I need forgiveness, it helps me be more forgiving. And I know that’s kind of the way it works. But like I said, there are some of those things that you may need some extra help with.

Hank Smith: 01:40 Yeah, there’s this story of the unmerciful servant in Matthew 18, which can be profound for anyone who’s in this position. This servant gets forgiven of this massive debt, but then he goes out and tries to attack another person who he’s supposed to forgive. I think one of the things that we can learn here is, part of forgiveness, at least in the beginning, is not going out and trying to harm the other person. That’s part of forgiveness. Sometimes we think, oh, I’ve got to go straight to forgiving from my heart, which eventually will come. But in this first part it’s, don’t go out and seek that person and try to harm them or talk about them or write about them online. That’s step one in this.

  02:25 And then I think if this servant would’ve gone back to the Lord and said, “How did you do that? How did you forgive me that massive debt? I’ve got this other one that’s way smaller and I can’t forgive it?” That would be a totally different parable if he returns to the Lord and says, “How do I become more like you?” I think that’s what you’re saying, John, is go to the Lord and say, “How do I forgive? Teach me to forgive like you forgive.”

John Bytheway: 02:48 Yeah, and I think it’s been helpful just as we’ve talked, Hank, this year. Reading these stories, reading about people who have struggled with the same thing. Listening to conference talks about forgiveness. I think it helps us to know if these people can do it, maybe I can do it too, and really understanding what it means and the Lord’s justice and mercy and how we need that too. But it’s a process for some of those really tough things that we’re talking about. Don’t give up, but recognize you may need some heavenly help.

Hank Smith: 03:19 Yeah, I don’t like verse 35 when he says, “This is going to be you if you don’t forgive.” But I do like that he doesn’t say in verse 35, “If from your hearts you forgive not every one his brother, their trespasses” right now. I think if you’re saying, well, I want to forgive, you’re on the right road.

John Bytheway: 03:37 Yeah, and that’s in the Lord’s prayer, forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors. Or forgive those who trespass against us, because that’s going to happen all the time, and forgiveness is kind of a way of life for us, not just an event. I would think.

Hank Smith: 03:52 Beautiful. John, what I hear you saying is, it’s a process, get on the road, ask the Lord for help, and he’ll see you through to the end where you actually can truly say, I have forgiven this person.

John Bytheway: 04:08 Yeah. I’ve read stories that I just think, ah, how did they do that? And it’s like, they must have had help. That’s how they did it.

Hank Smith: 04:17 They must have had help, and that help is available to you too. We hope you’ll join us on our full podcast. It’s called followHIM. You can get it wherever you get your podcast. Joining us this week is Dr. Krystal Pierce, and she does a great job unpacking this parable, so we’d love to have you hear that. And then come back next week, we’ll have another followHIM favorites.